finding yourself

by justineshungry

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I’m sorry it’s been a while since I’ve posted something on here.
There are no excuses.
I’ve just been procrastinating like crazy lately; it takes up so much of my time!

Cleaning my entire room and reorganizing my whole closet seems to take priority over everything else when a good TV show is on, but now that my whole room is clean (like really clean), there’s not much I can do other than steal away those sweet moments of washing the dishes or basically anything other than doing any sort of mental work.

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As you may or may not know, I’m currently on the edge of my last weeks of high school, and senioritis has hit me hard.
But not only that, the anxiety and excitement from the month of March (aka college acceptance/rejection time) combined with procrastination station has left me with no other choice than to just sit outside somewhere or lay in my bed for hours on end and think about where my future is heading.

I’m a big believer in not at all knowing where I’m going because things are constantly changing.
No one can say for sure where they’ll be in 10 years, just where they’ll want to be.

I think my biggest problem is that I don’t even know that yet.
It’s hard to plan so far ahead when there are so many things I haven’t even discovered yet (gooey cheese alert), including myself.

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Of course I have goals I want to achieve and certain criteria I want to fulfill by a certain age, but what if my tastes change, or my whole perspective on life changes; I know I’m saying the word “but” a lot, but (ha) I can’t help it. I really have no idea what might happen, and I don’t want to assume anything because you know what they say when you assume.

Like Ed Fairburn’s art here, I want to find myself through all of my adventures travels to establish who I am in this world.

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I guess that’s all I have to say on that subject for now.
Thanks for reading my short reflective rant about how I’m like every other teenager in college-decision limbo, I appreciate it.

There’s nothing wrong with not knowing something because sometimes ignorance really is bliss.

x

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Map portraits by Ed Fairburn:
http://edfairburn.com/

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